Conversations Between Workers

The scene: Sitting at my desk that is located in my bedroom.

Ball Winder (BW): We need to have a talk. Now.

Me: Um….ok. How did you get up here from the basement?

BW: I’m a plastic and metal object engaging in a lucid conversation and you’re concerned with how I move?

Me: Ok. Point made. So, what can I do for you?

BW: I’ve been feeling emotionally neglected lately. I hardly ever see you anymore.

Me: I know it’s been a while. You’re all the way down in the basement, and I’m not getting down there as often as I used to.

BW: And whose fault is that? You put me there! Besides it’s only 2 flights of stairs. Do I have to remind you what your GP said about getting more exercise at your last physical?

Me: No….(sets down chocolate bar)… you know I have been busy with computer work lately and haven’t had as much time to stitch.

BW: I know that can be tough… (looks over at side table)…Wait! That’s a wound cake of yarn! I don’t recognize that yarn. I didn’t wind that yarn! What’s going on here?!?

Me: Um…well it was just one ball of yarn and when I was at the fiber festival last year I picked up this nostepinne….

BW: A NOSTEPINNE?!?! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME WITH A NOSTEPINNE?!?!

Me: Calm down. It was just one ball of yarn…

BW: CALM DOWN! I’VE GIVEN YOU THE BEST 7 YEARS OF MY LIFE AND YOU TAKE UP WITH THAT HUSSY OF A NOSTEPINNE!?!

Me: (Gulp)…It was just one ball of yarn…and I was weak….I was upstairs and it was upstairs and I didn’t want to have to go down to the basement…

BW: THAT’S IT! I’M LEAVING! YOU UNGRATEFUL *censored* *censored* *censored*.

(Door slams.)

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